Did I seriously not post at all in March? How can that be? It's crazy how time seems to be in warp speed now. People kept telling me that once you have kids that it goes by so fast. Well, I believe them now. I don't know if it's because you're busier with them or they add extra things, but it's so true. My child is going to be one in a little over a month. How did that happen?
Lately, I've tried to spend more time living in the moment. It's hard for me. I have a constant list of what I need to be doing. I can't seem to stay on top of house work or really anything. I find myself staying up later and later trying to get everything done. I keep thinking that I will come up with some system that works for me and everything will get better. Well, it hasn't happened yet. So, I've said the heck with it on a few days and just spent hours playing in the floor with Nola. I mean, now that she's mobile, it's not like I can get a lot done anyways. It's more important for me to savor every moment with her because every day seems to fly by and I can't get this time back.
As the prospects for a second child looms closer and closer, I find myself clinging to this time with Nola. In a way, I want her to stay by herself for as long as possible, but I also know that I'm not getting any younger and that she will love having a playmate around. No, we're not trying now, but probably will at the end of this year. If God's willing, then we'll be granted another beautiful O baby.
Actually typing that out, made my heart beat speed up a little. I'm going to keep trying to figure things out and what to give up on and let go. Eventually, probably when they are off to school, I'll finally have a clean house, plans with friends, date nights, and a level head. Until then, I'm just wishing time would slow down just a little bit and that I will magically develop a photographic memory to remember every second of this time with Nola.
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